Whatever she's arguing, it amounts to her saying that she has some right or imperative to erase and ignore other people's pain when it suits her and her view of How To Fix The World And All Those Other People.
I've seen her "I was raised by radical second-wave lesbians" excuse in pretty much EVERY discussion like this that comes up that she's part of. I find it to be disingenuous. Nor do I think that miir or any other person who comes to her and tells her that using "deathmarch" to describe something she does voluntarily and FOR MONEY is erasing and hurting them should give a flying fuck about it.
When someone is hurting you? How they were raised is not your problem and anyone who expects you to even give a damn IS the problem.
Why should any of Bear's upbringing matter to those who want her to stop appropriating and erasing their history just so she can look marginally clever (and shill some books)? Bringing it up as though it changes the level or amount of hurt she dealt to so many people is a clear sign of her disrespect and just how centered she is on herself and her own views of the world.
Her intentions, her thought processes, her philosophies do not change the reality of things for those she hurts and dismisses. Acting like it does or should or ever will is part of her waving around her privilege.
Yes, she may have been raised in a politically and personally toxic environment. A lot of other people I know were too. I come from the South (Tennessee specifically). So the argument that somehow, she's got a free pass because she was harmed by "political correctness" gives me a case of Epic Eyerolling. I've met a lot of people who claim they're victims of political correctness, for a lot of reasons. And none of them actually are.
Given what I know (from her own statements), she's the victim of an abusive household and subculture that manipulated/misused "political correctness" as a policing tool, not of "political correctness" (ie, the disuse of hurtful language and actions towards marginalized groups) itself. However, she seems unwilling to make this distinction, or realize how this abuse does not exempt her from making sure she's not being abusive towards other people.
And no amount of toxic upbringing gives you the right or the place to dismiss and erase other people's history and their present hurt as part of your own warped sense of liberating yourself. When your liberating of yourself hurts others, you stop being the abuse survivor and start becoming the abuser.
Elizabeth Bear keeps saying she wants to do better. Or "fail better" as she puts it, because apparently trying not to fail at all is beyond her. That's the problem here. Not only does she expect HER personal issues to be the problem of those she's hurt - but she talks about working within her awareness of those issues while not doing anything that actually looks like CHANGING HER BEHAVIORS.
She's been called on this TWICE. Both times, she's been dismissive and carried on doing that same hurtful thing without even offering a genuine apology that admits that she DID something hurtful.
So, no. I'm afraid it's actually worth very little.
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Re: Via network
Date: 2010-08-07 11:43 am (UTC)I've seen her "I was raised by radical second-wave lesbians" excuse in pretty much EVERY discussion like this that comes up that she's part of. I find it to be disingenuous. Nor do I think that
When someone is hurting you? How they were raised is not your problem and anyone who expects you to even give a damn IS the problem.
Why should any of Bear's upbringing matter to those who want her to stop appropriating and erasing their history just so she can look marginally clever (and shill some books)? Bringing it up as though it changes the level or amount of hurt she dealt to so many people is a clear sign of her disrespect and just how centered she is on herself and her own views of the world.
Her intentions, her thought processes, her philosophies do not change the reality of things for those she hurts and dismisses. Acting like it does or should or ever will is part of her waving around her privilege.
Yes, she may have been raised in a politically and personally toxic environment. A lot of other people I know were too. I come from the South (Tennessee specifically). So the argument that somehow, she's got a free pass because she was harmed by "political correctness" gives me a case of Epic Eyerolling. I've met a lot of people who claim they're victims of political correctness, for a lot of reasons. And none of them actually are.
Given what I know (from her own statements), she's the victim of an abusive household and subculture that manipulated/misused "political correctness" as a policing tool, not of "political correctness" (ie, the disuse of hurtful language and actions towards marginalized groups) itself. However, she seems unwilling to make this distinction, or realize how this abuse does not exempt her from making sure she's not being abusive towards other people.
And no amount of toxic upbringing gives you the right or the place to dismiss and erase other people's history and their present hurt as part of your own warped sense of liberating yourself. When your liberating of yourself hurts others, you stop being the abuse survivor and start becoming the abuser.
Elizabeth Bear keeps saying she wants to do better. Or "fail better" as she puts it, because apparently trying not to fail at all is beyond her. That's the problem here. Not only does she expect HER personal issues to be the problem of those she's hurt - but she talks about working within her awareness of those issues while not doing anything that actually looks like CHANGING HER BEHAVIORS.
She's been called on this TWICE. Both times, she's been dismissive and carried on doing that same hurtful thing without even offering a genuine apology that admits that she DID something hurtful.
So, no. I'm afraid it's actually worth very little.