The green eyed monster rears it's head

[megwrites]

There are some surprisingly bitter moments in the writing life, or well, the attempt to become a professional. For instance, seeing someone (not a friend, I should add, because I'd be really happy for a friend) announce they've been offered representation by an agent who rejected you after getting your hopes up for no good reason.

This is why I am ever so glad that I was raised in the South. Because we Southern ladies have a long and proud tradition of being able to smile while gritting our teeth and pretending to be happy for people even as we're silently hoping they accidentally tuck the back of their skirt into their pantyhose and have toilet paper stuck to their shoes for the rest of eternity. We can be vicious bitches when we want to.

Or, as we say in my family, you can insult anyone you like as long as you begin with the phrase, "God bless their heart..."

I suppose it's just kind of a twist of the knife to see someone who obviously beat you out for something you really wanted. I don't do so well with competition. Well, I don't do well with abject defeat. Not one of my finer features as a human being, and it always shocks me how ugly it can turn me.

Well, this game is about being able to lose nine and win ten. So, I will do the only thing I know to do. Go outside, exercise off some of the bile and jealousy and then sit my ass down and keep working on my current project. When in doubt, get back to work, right?

Comments

[chris-r-evans.livejournal.com]

Absolutely right. Use it for fuel. One of my favorite sayings is "the harder you work, the luckier you get." Persistence will win out. It's like a car race, you only have to lead one lap...the last one.

Cheers,

Chris

[fiction-theory.livejournal.com]

Very true!

[chomiji]

Awww! That's always a tough row to hoe. Getting back to work is the right thing to do, but no one can pretend that it's easy in these circumstances.

>hugs!<

[fiction-theory.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I just needed to exorcise that particular demon before I went on.

*hugs back*

[tltrent.livejournal.com]

I love what you say about us Southern women. It's so very true! But there really is only one thing to do after a tilt like that and that's get back in the saddle, as you well know. ;)

[fiction-theory.livejournal.com]

Yeah, us ladies from south of the Mason Dixon do have our cultural quirks, don't we? I'm from Tennessee, BTW. You?

And yeah, that's another thing us Southern ladies are known for. We take a lickin', keep on tickin'.

[merriehaskell.livejournal.com]

I understand being insanely jealous--I do, 'cause I've been there--but I'm a little concerned by this sentence: "I suppose it's just kind of a twist of the knife to see someone who obviously beat you out for something you really wanted."

It's not a zero-sum game. It's not one winner for every so many losers. There is not a finite number of slots in an agent's stables. You quite literally are only in competition with yourself at this stage.

It's good you want to turn bile into productivity. But if bile is always going to be your kneejerk reaction to other people succeeding, you're going to drown in it. It is not worth the lining of your stomach (metaphorically or literally).

[merriehaskell.livejournal.com]

And when I say "I've been there" I should probably add "Heck, I'm still there..."

[fiction-theory.livejournal.com]

It's not a zero-sum game. It's not one winner for every so many losers. There is not a finite number of slots in an agent's stables.

While publishing in general isn't a zero-sum game, it is true that one agent can only take on so many clients. So the slots are limited. That doesn't mean slots don't open up, either. Or that new agents don't appear.

It's good you want to turn bile into productivity. But if bile is always going to be your kneejerk reaction to other people succeeding, you're going to drown in it.

Don't worry, I don't intend to be jealous. I think this one just struck me at an odd moment. Usually when I hear someone's gotten an agent my reaction is a) good on you and b) who's your agent and are they still accepting submissions?

Like I said, sometimes the bitter moments are a surprise.

[merriehaskell.livejournal.com]

It is true that one agent can only take on so many clients. So the slots are limited.

True. But you two were not in the same slush pile at the same time (if it's who I think it is), so considering it beating out is really just unfair. To all of you.

Sometimes the bitter moments are a surprise.

Fair enough. And I'm glad, 'cause losing you to insanity/bile-drowning was not on my agenda. :)