megwrites | Random thoughts

Whenever I see calls for queer SF/F, or queer fiction in general, I always wonder if I would be allowed to submit, if I fit under the category of "queer", if what I write fits under the category of "queer".

I write plenty of things with/about people who are neither cisgendered nor straight, I write stories of gay couples and lesbian adventurers (that lesbian pirate story will see an audience one day, I hope) and folks who began life as one gender but knew they were another.

But does that count? I don't think I've ever written a story that was centered on anyone's sexuality so much as what they're doing. I mean, yeah, the sexuality enters into it sometimes and for different reasons, but that's never been the thrust of the story.

Is queer fiction just fiction with queer people or is there another element to it?

For reference: I am a cisgendered, bisexual female. Yeah, I know. It seems like every girl who gets drunk at a party and smooches other drunk co-eds for the enjoyment of cheering frat boys claims to be as well.

Which is precisely the problem. Seems like, sometimes, being bisexual doesn't count for anything. I'm not straight enough to be heterosexual. The women I've loved and been with don't go away, the things I feel for and about other women don't go away. Yet, I can play straight if I have to (around certain family members, for instance). I'm engaged to a cisgendered male, so people make understandable presumptions. And for that reason, I often wonder if I have a place at the queer table, if I'm allowed. Do I count?

I guess there are moments when I feel as though I have to fight both sides just to be recognized, just to have my identity acknowledged as real, legitimate, and not just a phase or a state of confusion. Because I'm definitely not confused about this, and I never was. I've always known that I'm not straight, and I've always known that I'm not gay. I didn't just "go over to the dark side" during college and come back when it was convenient, but keep the name to give me street cred. I'm not a lesbian in denial.

This is me. I'm here. I'm real and I really feel these things. I'm not lying, and I'm not too stupid or confused to know what I feel. I'm a conscientious adult who knows her own mind. And for the record, I've never once kissed a girl for anyone's pleasure and enjoyment but my own, and every time I have been with women, I've been stone cold sober and there way nary a frat boy in sight.

I've seen collections of Gay and Lesbian fiction (collectively and separately), and that's a good thing. My word, I'm not crying for less Gay/Lesbian fiction. I say, more! Let us have more queerness, queerness all over! But I don't think I've ever seen collections of Bisexual fiction. And I wish I did. It'd be nice, you know? Nice if every once and a while I saw stories about people that were like me.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

If you're willing to read amateur erotic fiction (sometimes very, very amateur), the MFF threesome stories at http://literotica.com almost always include both heterosexual and bisexual female activity.

I've heard of literotica for a while now, but it's not what I'm talking about at all. I'm not so much looking for erotica - not that there's anything wrong with erotica - as I am straight up literature. And perhaps there's something that was not clear about in my post, but I'm not at all looking for that sort of thing.

almost always include both heterosexual and bisexual female activity.

That's another problem. I really have no interest in seeing just the female side of the line, or seeing it portrayed as just a fetish. Nor do I believe that having a threesome instantly turns a woman into a bisexual. In fact, I believe the opposite.

Just as a person in the closet can marry and have children in a hetero marriage and still be completely homosexual - so a person can go around having threesomes and whatever else and never be bisexual.

So, again, thank you for the link, but it's really not what I'm looking for at all.

Well, sure you fit in, and your stories fit in.
Lesbian pirates? Sweet Suffering Sappho, have you ever read "I Was Kidnapped by Lesbian Pirates from Outer Space?" (http://www.drunkduck.com/I_Was_Kidnapped_By_Lesbian_Pirates_From_Outer_Space/)

I think anyone looking to exclude you would be someone who's jealous of your heteronormativity. By that I mean that you can marry the boy and have the option from hiding from judgmental relatives or crazy religiots. Not saying that you do or that you're only queer when it's convenient. I know you, and that's not you at all.I'm just saying that some gay people think that way about bi people.

WTF is it with people who dig for reasons to exclude after they've been excluded? They know damn well what it's like. And it's not like the world needs more division and strife.

Often gay people discriminate against trans people. Like, they'll say a lesbian trans woman cannot be truly lesbian and want nothing to do with her. Or when a trans man who once IDed as a lesbian comes out as a straight man, he'll often lose the support of his community. And so will his girlfriend - who is probably struggling with it and needs the support of her friends more than ever.

And don't get me started on gay men vs. gay women.

I don't know what I am anymore. I'm not seeking to label myself, but I definitely have a lesbian relationship. In my own way I get to hide in that. When you ID as bi, you get the denotation of it along with a lot of connotations which are not true.

Not only can you fall in love with a man, a woman, or even someone inbetween, which would be the definition.
People hear you're bi, and they may think all kinds of things.
When you're a lesbian, sure, you're still going to hell, but at least no frat guy is going to ask you to have a 4some with their roommate and girlfriend.

Wow, I have really waxed on about this stuff. At any rate, sure you're queer. You're still wearing your pride bracelet, right? :)

WTF is it with people who dig for reasons to exclude after they've been excluded? They know damn well what it's like. And it's not like the world needs more division and strife.

Yeah, that kind of boggles me. I think it's human nature. Because everyone on this planet has been hurt by something at least once in their life, but yet we find ways and excuses to go on hurting each other, even though we know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of it.

I guess people are better at passing on pain than healing it, which may be the prime defect in our species.

Wow, I have really waxed on about this stuff.

Please, wax as much and often as you like. About this. I think overwaxing can give you a rash in real life though, so maybe exercise moderation in hair removal, but you know what I mean. :)

I'm glad you did say something (I'm almost always glad when you do!) and it makes me feel better to know that at least one person understands and knows what's going on and accepts me for it.

Because I've gotten some harsh comments from people who were gay/lesbian, but I try to remember that right now there are people fighting for the right just to be recognized and equal, and that kind of frustration and pressure from that has to be reaching Pompeiian levels by now (Pliny notes the mountain has taken up smoking...).

So it's nice when someone says, "Hey, I get it."

You're still wearing your pride bracelet, right? :)

Less often than before because it was kind of irritating the skin on my wrist, but I think I shall go and put it back on right now. :)

There was some study once where people who experienced pain were more likely to inflict it on others. Which is made of lame. I hope I don't do that.

Harsh comments from the G/L peoples? Huh. What happened there?

Yeah, it's not easy to be ghey. It's right up there with being green.

But whence the harshness? Why is anything Meg's fault?

You must torrent the BBC3 show Being Human. I have a new love, and I must share it.

Random thoughts

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

an unrelated comment because this is the first available threat