megwrites

Angsty!Meg is now less angsty. Nothing like a good book and Eddie Izzard to act like Writer's Drain-O when you've got writer's clog. Cake or death, indeed.

My new layout is up! It should work just fine in everyone's browsers, but if it doesn't let me know. I tested in Safari and Firefox, but IE might want to be wonky. IE doesn't like livejournal layouts as a whole, it seems.

I finished Cast In Secret last night and started the very, very beginning of Ink & Steel. I now realize that I have a buttload of book reviews to put up. I haven't reviewed anything since, like, May I think. And I've read quite a bit in that time.

I'm back working on the Tower!Guy story, with renewed enthusiasm. While I still have feelings of "wow, I suck as a writer", I also know that the story itself isn't broken. Plus, I'm getting closer to the end and my wordcount is staying down. Yay! Hopefully I won't have a ginormous 120k doorstop of doom like I did last time.

The good thing about progress notes is that they're sort of a motive for me to keep writing. I know, I know, it sounds silly. But I really do get some motivation for writing from these things. I think to myself, "Self, if I don't get any writing done, I won't have any progress made, thus no progress notes to share with people."

Yeah, silly. But anything that keeps you going, right?


Project: Tower!Guy Story

Wordcount: 57949 (+7751)

Goal: 100,000 or less

Deadline: September 1st

Reason For Stopping: Tired.

Exercise: Got a good solid walk in this morning with sporadic, very (very!) short bursts of jogging.

Stimulants/Chemicals: Mildly alcoholic cider with dinner.

Musical Inspiration: Rihanna - Disturbia; Iron & Wine w/ Calexico - Burn That Broken Bed; Thomas Newman - Ghosts

Other Creative Activities: Is organizing things creative?

Reading Materials: Finished Urban Shaman by C.E. Murphy, started on Queen Isabella by Alison Weir.

Darling du Jour:

Mean Things: Forcibly being married off; admitting to mass murder; lying a lot; facing torture and execution

Things Learned/Discovered: Working on two projects: not so grate akshully.

I'm back from Florida and safely in New York City. Of course, it's only for a few hours. I'm headed to Hartford in the morning for a week long dog/cat/fish/lizard-sitting extravaganza. It's going to be awesome, and I anticipate that I might get to do a little more work on the Tower!Guy story, as well as my other idea.

Re: my complete indecision about whether to change horses in midstream with the whole Tower!Guy Story project, I've decided that I don't have to decide. There's no reason why I can't work on both, especially since the other idea I have is still in it's beginning stages and Tower!Guy (I promise, I have a better title) is on it's end run. Seriously. This is the last damn draft I'm doing. If this draft doesn't work out, to hell with it.

Bookwise, I hit a jackpot in Florida and got a real bargain on these books:

The Queen's Bastard by C.E. Murphy
Urban Shaman by C.E. Murphy (which is good, because I accidentally picked up book two first)
His Majesty's Dragon by Naomi Novik
Swordspoint by Ellen Kushner

I finished Swordspoint on the plane and started Urban Shaman. I'd type out a real review of Swordspoint but it would basically amount to: Oh hell yes. Alec/Richard for the win. Duchess Tremontaine for the win. Crazy swordfighting and bitchy nobles for the win.

I will say, despite all the awesome, I liked Privilege of the Sword slightly better, for various reasons. But it's like saying which of my favorite flavors of ice cream I like better. I may prefer pralines and pecan to cookies 'n cream, but they're both delicious.

So far, Urban Shaman is a snarky, smooth kind of read like one of those really fancy vodkas with the fruit flavoring. It goes down burning, and makes you like it.

Oh, and I get to indulge in more book buying goodness because guess what else is in Connecticut? THE BOOK BARN! Can this week get any better? I think not.

Didn't get as much done writing wise this week as I had hoped. Especially since I'm at that stage where other ideas are coming around to distract me, like a cat rubbing up against you and purring. As fuzzy and tempting as it is, I have to stay the course.

Ideas really are like cats. They're beautiful and fickle, and no matter how lovely and playful and well behaved they are right now, they will hork on your carpet and leave little birdie torture victims on the porch. It's their nature. Thus, getting another cat won't solve the problem. Investing in carpet cleaner and a sturdy resolve is much more useful.

Luckily for me, this is the last go around for this story. If it doesn't work out now, it gets trunked. Because if I can't shape this story acceptably, then it means I'm not ready, mentally or professionally, to write it yet.

I imagine my progress notes are pretty horribly boring to anyone else, but I post them in case someone is randomly curious - and because they help me.


Project: Tower!Guy Story

Wordcount: 50198 (+ 8829)

Goal: 100,000

Deadline: End of August

Reason For Stopping: Dinner

Exercise: Brief walk to go get breakfast, besides that, utter laziness. Cat nap included.

Stimulants/Chemicals: Naproxen for headache caused by next door neighbor's excessively loud home improvement project. Is the cement mixer and jackhammer *really* necessary on a Sunday. Really?

Musical Inspiration: Been keeping The Frames on tap. "Pretty" by the Cranberries is sort of creepy but sets a good mood. Mostly been surfing the random shuffle.

Other Creative Activities: Painting. Did a still life of a pear that didn't suck as much as I thought it would suck.

Darling du Jour:

"I think I might want to do business with you," Sephon said.

The knife lowered again, the sarcasm returned. "You shouldn't go into business with women."

"Why is that?"

"I hear in town that we're very underhanded and bad with money," Eiryn said.

"And I've heard that the way to wisdom is not to believe everything you hear said in town."

Mean Things: Trying to stab people, intense physical pain, not being warned of impending intense physical pain, using marriage as a trap, bad fathers, regicide, wanting the affections of a person who is an emotional wasteland

Things Learned/Discovered: I never lack for mean things, which might say something about this novel, but I'm not sure what. I need to get a move on if I want this done by the end of August.

I chickened out of going to Fantastic Fiction at the KGB Bar last night. I made up a bunch of excuses, but it basically boils down to anxiety and social awkwardness and fear. And I really wanted to go, too, but that's the nature of anxiety. It'll steal anything you don't nail down.

But on more positive notes, I did have a productive writing day to the tune of 3000 words and change. I also read through some of the earlier chapters that I'd reshaped and they were at least 40% less crappy than I thought at the time I was writing them.

I'm still tinkering with the progress notes format, because I intend to make a study of the writing/revision process so that the next time it'll go quicker.

Project: Tower!Guy Story (working title)

Wordcount: 37143 (+ 3735)

Goal: 100,000 words or less

Deadline: August-ish.

Reason For Stopping: Exhaustion and errands that needed running.

Exercise: Slower walk than usual, still working back up to my previous pace. Did lots of errands.

Stimulants/Chemicals: None.

Musical Inspiration: "If I Never See Your Face Again" - Maroon 5 f/ Rihanna. The explosive chords and combative, sexy duo are good for a fight scene between characters who are snarling at each other. Also good exercise music.

Darling du Jour: "Goddess preserve me. A princess who doesn't know the name of her own land. "

Mean Things: Fighting. Calling someone stupid who isn't. Calling someone "crazy" who actually *is* mentally ill. Inquiring very rudely about the sexual practices of relative strangers. Trying to marry off fifteen-year-old girls to older men. Gambling. Stalking.

Things Learned/Discovered: When I type from my notebook, the amount of typos goes up exponentially and I feel like an ass having to make up fictional plants. Oh, yeah, and I frakking love fights and argument scenes, maybe as much as I love sex scenes. I can't justify having my characters have dirty, dastardly fight!sex in this story, but maybe the next one. I have mental issues, Y/Y?

Since about Thursday, the creativity faucet got turned on high hot and all the way. Since Thursday I have:

1. Picked up speed (finally!) on the Tower!Guy Story revisions. I rocketed through the end of one chapter, and will probably be done with another by the end of the day, and see no reason I'm not going to zoom through the next chapter.

2. Painted a picture. Not sure if I should scan it in and share it with anyone as I'm still in the process of getting my bearing with acrylics, especially since I started out learning to paint with oils.

3. Exercised my photography muscles by taking a bunch of pictures of assorted things in the psuedo-garden behind my apartment building. The pictures of the rose are my favorite. Although, I sort of risked life and limb to get the pictures of the rose. Because it wasn't like the damn thing was right in front of me. It was actually on top of a big thorny bush that was taller than me. So I had to climb on top of a somewhat dodgy ceramic planter (never again will I go into a garden wearing neon green flip flops) and sort of stick the camera in there and eyeball it. Still, I think my photoggery has improved. Especially since I've got The Boy's ultra-sweet camera to do it with.

The funny part of this had nothing to do with the pictures, though. The funny part was when I was walking back to my apartment and overheard a conversation through an open window and didn't catch on at first.

You have to understand that this neighbor, who I'll call Ms. J, is a woman in her late-60's maybe 70's. She's very quiet, reserved, looks a bit mean, and perpetually lives in her Hawaiian-flower nightgown.

So I'm walking through the alley by the apartment and I hear her talking to her daughter, who's very loud, typically New York voice I recognize:

Ms. J's Daughter: So, tell me about Linda. What does she do?

Ms. J: (mumble mumble something I can't hear)...Scrabble.

Ms. J's Daughter: Oh, she plays Scrabble. But what does she do all day?

Ms. J: (mumble mumble, still can't hear)

Ms J's Daughter: Well, did she at least give you a shower? That's the best part, when they give you a shower.

Me: o_O. *eyebrow raise*

And my first thought was, Sweet moses on the mount, I didn't know Ms. J was a lesbian. And what the hell kind of kinky stuff is going on if her daughter is asking if her girlfriend gives her a bath? Privacy much?. (Yes, I realize the irony of thinking this as I'm eavesdropping, but the window was open, and this lady was loud and it's New York City).

I walked away, and then after a few minutes of thought, realized that they were actually talking about the home health nurse that Ms. J has, because Ms. J suffered an unfortunate fall and broke her hip last year.

4. Thought up a great new idea that would make a fantastic Fantasy/Romance/Mystery story. It includes such exciting elements as: Princes In Disguise! Hundreds of Virgins, None of Whom Actually Are! Intrigue! Swordfighting Women! Important Social Discourse! And most importantly: Surprise Buttsex! Not sure what I shall title it in my head. I'm sure by now anyone who's checked out my tags realizes that my working titles lack any kind of elegance.

5. Revised and refined the UF!2Girls project such that I think it might stand a chance of one day getting to reader for an opinion of whether it, too, deserves it's turn on the Submission Wheel.

6. Wrote three poems. Eventually I'll get around to posting them, probably. Maybe. I really hate f%^king poetry, you know that? Grr. Argh. *Finger monster*

7. Finished off one of my paper writing journals and started a new one. It's a cute little red Miquelrius notebook. Yes, yes, I know. It's supposed to be Moleskine or bust for us writery types, but honestly? Moleskines are nice, but overrated.

Ah, it's that time of year again. The time when I get to read my f-list and hear about the various cons that everyone else is attending or will be attending shortly. Wheee. Let the flood of con reports come upon the f-list like a mighty wave.

I've always wanted to go to a con, but frankly, I've either been short of the money or the time to go to one and I'm bit afraid. For varying reasons.

Happy Memorial Day to them that celebrate it. And to the many brave, wonderful servicepeople who have given life and limb for our country: my heartiest thanks.

No matter what I think of the war, of our commander-in-chief, of our politics - there is no denying that the men and women of our armed forces deserve our support and thanks for the sacrifices they make. While I disagree with our president's decisions, it gives me great hope to know that if the time comes when military action is legitimately needed, that these will be the people who keep us safe.

Now, that said, onto the writing.

This weekend, of course, has been rubbish for getting much writing done. But I sat down, and with the aid of some vanilla tea (my writing beverage of choice), got a pretty respectable sprint of writing done in my notebook.

I'm halfway, thematically (and probably wordcount-wise) through this chapter. I'm hoping to pick up some momentum now that I've gotten through the exposition-y bits that needed the most dire rearranging.

My writing/editing/rewriting this past week has been for crap. I'm stuck on this one chapter and sort of dreading the next.

At this point, I feel like my ability to write is devolving to the point where I may soon lose all command of the English language, much like a ship's captain who's handed out too many lashes, canceled shore leave, and thrown all the rum overboard. Prepositions are hell when you give them cutlasses and nothing to lose, but mostly I think it would be the verbs running around doing everything. The nouns would just sort of be standing around, offering helpful grunts of "yeaaah!" and "walk the plank!" when appropriate, possibly making rude gestures and whistling at the wenches on shore.

The good news: at least I'm not writing in Latin. Because when Latin rebels against you, it doesn't just mutiny. It takes over your whole damn country, sells your family into slavery, marches you down the Appian way, and beats you with the ablative case every step of the way.

But enough of that.

Part of me is wondering if this story is still worth telling, if there's anything particularly unique or exciting about it. Even with other stories where I know the mechanics are bad, there are still sparkly bits that remind me that it's worth saving. It's a bit frustrating. Because a lot of it feels very drab and gray and humdrum.

I'm having a hard time finding anything sparkly among the mounds of drek that seem to compose this novel.

My motivation has reached an all time low, which means that I haven't even gotten near my 5000 word a day goal. Yes, I know it's on the high side but I also know I'm capable of it. Plus, even if I fall short of that by half, I still have a respectable 2500 words to show for my slogging.

Which is why I'm determined to step up my output next week. So even if I have to handcuff myself to my computer, disable internet access, and nail the door shut, I will make my goal. This novel will get edited and completed and sent off to readers.

Although, if it sucks after this draft, it's getting put out to the glue factory pasture.

matociquala did the first line meme. So I decided to do the first line meme, except with modifications. Hers is cooler though.

( First paragraphs from all my currently open WIP's. )

Well, it's taken me nearly twenty years to learn how to write. I just hope it won't take another twenty for me to figure out how to edit.

I have no idea how to measure progress on editing, because I've realized I'm not entirely sure how to judge when the story or even a particular chapter/section is ready. It's not like making casserole. You can't just peak in the oven and see if the crust is golden brown or anything. Hell, there's not even a timer that dings.

I was using Holly Black's One Pass Revision Method but I think I've also realized that revision and editing may not be exactly the same thing. It's a good method, but I think it only can work when you're sure that the fundamental structure of the story is good.

And to metaphorize: if stories are like houses, then I think that this house not only had errors in the construction, but the blueprints themselves were bad because the architect was a bit rubbish.

I think in my next lifetime, I'm going to take up an easier profession. Like building castles out of toothpicks or climbing Everest standing on my head. I shouldn't bitch. I knew this was going to be hard. And I'm still loving it, but sometimes it helps to let a little steam out of the pot and grumble. And in my next lifetime, I'll probably do this same damn thing, because Ceiling Cat help me, I do love it so.